We’re coming up on R U OK Day, September 14, and whilst it is so great to have a day dedicated to checking in on those close to you, these conversations should be happening all year round.

In case you need a humble reminder on just how easy it is to stay in touch with friends and family, we’ve rounded up six ways to show a loved one you really care. 

Actually tell them you do!

One of the best parts about being in someone’s life is the satisfaction of knowing that they know you care. That they’re health and happiness has an effect on you too. Telling a partner/parent/postman you adore them reinforces these feelings and keeps the relationship all sparkly and fresh. 

Perhaps the urge to tell your loved ones exactly how you feel is somewhat diluted by the fact that we’re texting and love-reacting and voice noting every other day. But just do it. Remind them. Make their day. 

Call and text and voice note. 

I wanna say this is a given, but if your name starts with ‘M’ and ends with ‘addie’ (guilty) sometimes you’ll get a message, consume it, and tell yourself you will respond when you aren’t power walking to work and curating a mental checklist for the day. But in actual fact you forget for three weeks then feel like a terrible friend…

Any message or reaction is better than none. Take a few minutes each morning to clear those personal notifications and keep those close conversations rolling. 

Shout them a coffee. 

A small yet delicious way to express your gratitude. Gift giving doesn’t have to be expensive or sentimental, it can be little gestures that take a load off a friend’s mind. And chances are, they’ll likely want to return the favour (more coffee dates!). 

A hot cuppa tastes better in good company, anyway. Add an almond croissant into the mix and you’re absolutely laughin’. 

Share book/tv/podcast recommendations you think they will love. 

So just jumping back on my point about calling, texting and voice noting. Here’s an idea. Shoot your friends a pop culture rec you really think they’ll love. Show them that you know what they’re interested in, and that you often think of them when going about your day at random. 

The next time you meet you’ll have a whole heap of lighthearted convo starters. 

Respond emotionally (then logically) to their rants. 

I think the majority of people will side with me on this, but when you want to get something off your chest, you don’t need the person(s) listening to hit you with logic. You want them to listen intently and rattle off audible gasps and multiple ‘OMGs’ and a few ‘no way’s’ to justify how you’re feeling. 

Always, always choose your significant other’s side of the fence. Then gently shimmy your way into camp logic if and when the argument presents itself. No one wants to be presented with facts first in an emotionally-charged convo. 

Plan date nights like you would with your partner. 

Open-ended hangouts like lazing in the park, or watching the waves roll in at the beach are so much harder to fall upon in adult life. Whether it’s because these habits have died (a three year pandemic should do it!) or you have a bunch more commitments (like tiny mouths to feed), it’s important not to forget the mindless fun of spending time with loved ones.